So, after another dismal tournament display from the England football team, we have another manager. The country’s merry-go-round of footballing disappointment was set in motion again on Wednesday with the announcement that Big Sam Allardyce will take the helm of the national team.
Hm, not quite Jose is it…
It remains to be seen if the former West Ham and Bolton boss is what the national team needs, but if he’s got any chance of success, he must avoid the pitfalls made by those who came before him.
Here’s five big mistakes that Big Sam should give a big miss.
Have a system / Avoid racial slurs (Roy Hodgson)
First rule of management – have a system. Throughout the Euros, England were lacking in any sort of organisation, and our go-to response when in trouble seemed to be the Sunday League logic of ‘bang on another striker’. Were we long ball? High-press? Tiki-Taka? If any of the England players knew the answer, they sure weren’t letting many in on the secret. So firstly, have a system. And secondly, avoid any monkey-astronaut anecdotes. Bad and incomprehensible jokes never got anyone anywhere.
Let the players live (Fabio Capello)
With the nation’s footballers being paid extortionate fees and indulging in luxury lifestyles, it may be tempting for Big Sam to go down the iron fist route tried and tested by Fabio Capello. Maybe a bit of discipline will get those performances in line. Under Capello, players were heavily restricted from leaving the team hotel in down time, not allowed to wear flip flops in public places, only allowed to use mobile phones inside their rooms and only given time to see WAGS on the day after games. It didn’t work. Many of the England players have reflected on how unhappy the camp was under Capello, and how they went stir-crazy in the hotel. Frustration and boredom is not known to breed productivity, so Sam should steer clear.
Qualify (Steve McClaren)
It’s not hard.
Also, avoid dodgy accents – they don’t fool anyone.
Avoid Temptation (Sven Goran Errikson)
Sven seemed like a pretty respectable man and had a glowing managerial record when he took the England job. Over his tenure though, he was often in the tabloids for the wrong reason. A much documented affair with Ulrika Jonsson brought a storm of headlines he and the team could have done without. Big Sam should avoid the trap that many men have fallen into (we see ya Bill Clinton) and not let the power get to his genitalia.
Keep any bonkers views private (Glenn Hoddle)
Some people have forgotten that ITV’s seemingly friendly pundit was sacked for fowl comments he made concerning disabled people. I guess the lesson is, don’t be bonkers. And if you are, avoid getting Taylor Swifted (recorded and exposed).
It’s a hard job, the England one, but if he can avoid those five blunders, Sam will be half way there.