News 22 March 2017
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Author: Trudy Barry

I’ve Got A Mate Volume 16: Green cards & porn

Author Trudy Barry
22 March 2017
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I’ve Got A Mate is your new go-to place for all advice love/sex/relationship related. If you’ve got a mate who’s having issues, drop us a tweet with the hashtag #AskTrudy, but don’t expect the response you want to hear.

Dear Trudy,

I’ve got a mate who’s got herself into a proper sticky situation involving love and the law. Her mate is Canadian and his visa was about to run out. They aren’t together but they’ve become proper good mates over the last couple years and she didn’t want him to have to leave the country.

She agreed to marry him so he could stay but they both knew it was purely a green card wedding. Now it’s been a couple weeks and he’s said he’s got actual, real feelings for her! Apparently he’s felt this way for a while. Obviously she has to keep staying with him to make the marriage look legit but she literally has no feelings for him like that. What should she do?


You lot are mad if you think I’m getting involved with your illegal sh-t. Delete my number. Next.

Dear Trudy,

I’ve got a mate who’s always had a jealousy issue. It’s ruined relationships for him in the past and he can see it happening in his current relationship, too. He doesn’t like his girlfriend to look at other guys because he’s worried she’ll cheat on him. He’s told her this and she gets it.

The other day he was watching porn at home and she walked into the room unexpectantly. He got embarrassed and went to close the laptop but she wanted him to leave it on so she could watch with him. It made him so angry, man! How could she get turned on by another guy and have no shame about doing it in front of him?


Oh my god, are you serious? Your mate watches porn but doesn’t want his girl to watch, too? DEAD. Honestly I’d tell your mate’s girl to chuck him, he obviously has no respect for her happiness and that is so dead.


Tell him to take a look at himself and realise that the issue here is him. Man’s so insecure that he can’t even bear the idea of his girl looking at another man on a screen? It’s actually laughable. To be honest this kind of controlling behaviour is even more likely to push a person to cheating so it’s a dumb plan anyway.


Tell you mate to stop being an idiot or know that he’ll be single soon.