I’ve Got A Mate is your new go-to place for all advice love/sex/relationship related. If you’ve got a mate who’s having issues, drop us a tweet with the hashtag #AskTrudy, but don’t expect the response you want to hear.
Dear Trudy
I’ve got a mate who needs your help. She’s been with her man for a minute now and things have been going fine, the passion died down a bit but she assumed that was normal after being together so long. Don’t get me wrong, they still f-ck, but it’s not an every day (or even every week) ting but the flame is still there.
Recently his phone went off when he was in the shower and my girl did a little investigating. Turns out the message was from another girl that he’s been f-cking! She was absolutely heartbroken of course and felt betrayed. They got a kid together though and she really loves him and doesn’t want to lose him. She thinks that maybe inviting this girl into their relationship will at least keep him close to home. Should she suggest the threesome in order to keep her man?
Rah. First of all, I feel for your girl, I do. Second of all, she needs to man the f-ck up now. This bredda has broken her trust and to be honest there isn’t really any going back after that. If she’s into then f-ck it yeah, invite another chick into your bed but she should never, ever do it to “keep her man”. F-ck that! Hes a grown ass man, he doesn’t need keeping like a pet.
End of the day there’s a kid connecting these two so there’s always going to be something connecting them. Honestly I say don’t do it, it doesn’t sound like this guy is worth it. But only she can make that decision. One thing she needs to think of first though: if she does this and it backfires, will she be able to look herself – and her kid – in the eye?
Dear Trudy
I’ve got a mate who’s looking more for an opinion than any advice. Something has come up in the news this week and it’s got him bare worked up. Basically, he likes some slightly left stuff in the bedroom which is probably a bit extreme, but who doesn’t you know? One of the things he’s into is getting golden showers. It might sound weird but man just likes getting p-ssed on, init.
Now this whole thing about Trump getting prostitutes to p-ss on Obama’s bed is going round and people’s reactions have got him shook. People are acting like it’s the worst thing in the world but to my mate it’s not that big a deal. Is he ever going to be able to ask a chick to do it and get the answer he wants?
Jesus f-cking Christ, you lot are testing me you know. First off, your mate’s idea of ‘extreme’ and someone else’s are probably quite different from the sounds of things – so don’t go lumping all of us in with him and his bedroom thoughts.
Secondly, your boy is into the same sexual fetishes as a racist orange blob with a cat’s arse for a mouth. Is that something he can live with?
That being said, I’m 99% he will probably find a girl who will do a p-ss on him. There’s some ratchet chicks out there, but chances are they probably won’t be wifey material…